Brokenness

Both yesterday and today my attention is drawn by the word in Acts 19 to the power in the name of Jesus. A team of brothers see St. Paul using the name of Jesus to cast out demons and maybe even heal the sick. They become very interested in this method and decide to try it out themselves on someone who is possessed by an evil spirit. They shout at that person, ‘in the name of Jesus Christ whom Paul preaches’. The evil spirit declares “Jesus I know, Paul I know, but who are you” and pounces on them and chases them out sans their clothes!

Why could Paul use the name of Christ to great effect whilst the brothers had no effect from that name? It is a question I can easily ask myself as I look back on my own life. There were many years when I preached almost the same words I am preaching now with little or no effect. The sermons were appreciated and the jokes laughed at. But a true conversion of heart was extremely rare and even then very short lived.

As I reflect this morning I realise the things that God has done in my life. Earlier though I loved the Lord and knew the scripture, my reliance was on my own self and my ministry was first and foremost a means of self expression and a fulfilment of my need to be appreciated.

Great crisis and great problems swept over my life almost a decade ago. It broke the confidence I had in my own self and ruined my good name amongst men. Desperate, hurting and lost I fell at the feet of Jesus and experienced deeply His forgiveness, mercy and restoring love. Loved by the Lord, held in His loving arms, I deeply experienced great security, enough to surrender to Him fully knowing that relying on my own self is of no use. The word used for this in the Bible is brokenness.

This new relationship with my Jesus and the new anointing infused supernatural power to everything within me and around me. It poured out from within me into the lives of those around me. I had found the fountain of living water. No, no Jesus led me to it kicking, screaming and protesting!

A three wheel driver who testified yesterday at the Kandy meeting explains it very beautifully. He is not Christian but saw the crowds in the Church and was drawn by curiosity. He listens from outside, gradually moves inside over the weeks, experiences a healing from the Lord, is touched by the Love of Jesus which has become real for him and now wants to give his life to the Lord!